Raw didn’t have much this week, but if you can’t get behind a slow build to a Shield reunion, there’s nothing you’ll like on the WWE main roster this week. Meanwhile, Hell in a Cell is tomorrow we don’t really care because: one or both of the Hype Bros might turn, Roode’s entrance will outdo Ziggler’s, Orton will have an Orton-ass match, The Usos and New Day will steal the show, Shane/KO will end badly, and we hope the U.S. and WWE Championships swap places. Finally, should we care about what’s going on with Bray? History should steer you on this one. Enjoy the Cell and hope for no Hell!
No Mercy is in the books and Cesaro will never be the same! Also, why does Bray Wyatt continue to be a terribly executed character study? Will Nia win the big one soon? What happens when John Cena is the victim of his own ridiculousness? Did Enzo have the Best Week Ever (TM)? All this, plus KO and Sami fight forever and Mickie James shows that she ain’t just some old lady to be trifled with.
Raise your hand if you hate ambulances! Also, Roman Reigns. If you raised them up for both, you were in luck this past week! Also, the shake-up went down and we’ve got brand-new feuds to look forward to! Ambrose/Miz! Zayn/Owens! Mahal/English! All that, plus: Wyatt and Balor will compete to see who is the silliest wrestler in WWE, the Cruiserweights made it a week to remember, and Drew McIntyre made his re-emergence in NXT.
We’ve arrived! The speculation ends as WrestleMania begins! Will The Broken Hardyz resist the temptation of tag team ladder matches? Will The Gorgeous Vampire Baron Corbin bring prestige back to the Intercontinental Championship that we forgot Dean Ambrose currently holds? Will we see a shooting star press from Lesnar? Will JR and The King return to call one more match? Will we care about Wyatt or Orton when all’s said and done? Tune in to the entire 6-hour extravaganza and find out!
The Royal Rumble is nearly here, and our biggest problem is TOO MANY MONSTERS! Meanwhile, Sami has a new character and it’s … different. Also, Charlotte fought a wavy tube man, Bray hit his son, Dolph tried to kill The King (again), and Mickie James made her return to the main roster! Time to reset and do all this stuff again! WHEEEEEEEEEEEE!